Are you the type of person who takes a trip to Bed Bath and Bodyworks every time someone’s birthday or a holiday rolls around? Does the staff at the Hallmark store know you by first name? Do you often find yourself gift wrapping your own appliances? If you answered yes to any of these, you should consider reading this article. Don’t be “that guy/girl” when it comes to giving gifts.

Take Notes:

The sure fire best way to become the ultimate gift giver is to pay attention. People love to talk about things they want. Maybe it’s our way of subconsciously letting others know what to get us. When someone’s birthday or a holiday is right around the corner, start making mental notes of the things they talk. It doesn’t even have to be something that they say they want. For example, you’re riding in a car with your friend and a song comes on the radio. He/she then says, “Oh my God, I love this band!” Ding, ding, ding, buy them the CD. Well, first make sure they don’t already own it, but you get the idea.

Don’t Give People Money:

Nothing says “I know absolutely nothing about you, nor could I be bothered to get you a proper gift,” like slipping someone a twenty in a card. When you give someone money as a gift it’s like your telling them, “This is how much you’re worth to me.” The only time it’s ever appropriate to give someone money, is when you plan on giving someone a ridiculous amount of money. Like, ungodly, Donald Trump money. Sure, it still may be a little thoughtless, but when people can’t count all the zeros on one hand, they won’t care. Trust me.

Know What Gifts Not to Give:

OK, there’s so many gifts that you shouldn’t give people that I’m just going to list them all first, and then elaborate. Here’s what gifts you shouldn’t give; awards, clothes, souvenirs, pets, novelties, hygiene products, and figurines. Unless you’re in fifth grade, that “#1 Dad” coffee mug isn’t going to cut it. Any type of award-gift serves no actual function and is useless to the recipient. Gifts that create work or responsibility, like pets, are a bad idea. Everyone loves a cute puppy, but not everyone wants to take care of one. In the movie Donnie Brasco, one gangster gives another gangster a pet lion as an insult. The reason it’s an insult is because he knows there is no way someone can take care of a lion. Speaking of insults, giving someone a hygiene product is a good way to do that. First of all, people buy themselves hygiene products all the time, so it’s not very special. Second of all, some people may take it the wrong way and think that you’re trying to give them a hint. Nothing says “You stink,” like a bottle of cologne or a stick of deodorant. The only exception, is if you’re buying expensive perfume for a woman; but you should still make sure it’s a kind that she likes. Buying clothes for someone is risky because they may not like them, or they may not fit. Take caution when buying clothes for someone else.